YOU

You
and me.
You, who decide
to make me happy,
And I,
who decide to act
like I don’t care.

So many things,
some said,
some unsaid,
and walking in long strides.
I can’t take compliments,
they all say.
Perhaps they are right.
I unceremoniously thank you.

Of course I’m flattered.
Everyone gets flattered.
I’m just the kind
who comes home,
thinks,
thinks some more,
and then decides that I’m not as good
as you said. 

For a few moments,
lives intersect.
And off we go.
For better or for worse.

Saying Goodbye

It’s always hard to say Goodbye. Jyoti’s going to India to study, and yesterday was I met her for the last time, probably for years. I know it’s best for her that she goes. I also know that even if she hadn’t gone, we would have only two months together till I went, but it’s still hard. The Goodbye was normal and I controlled myself on the tempo home, but after I got home, I couldn’t.

The diaries she gave me for safekeeping are still in that bag on the floor. I don’t want to keep them away just yet. Three years is a long time, and we went through a lot together. *Sigh* I’m gonna miss her.

Hopeless Romantics. ;)

“Think of love as a state of grace not the means to anything but the alpha and omega. An end to itself.” –From ‘Love in the Time of Cholera”

I’m becoming lovesick. Really. And for no one in particular. And since there are only a few people who listen to my bullcrap (about this) without calling me a despot, it’s finding its way into my blog. Some people are nice enough to say it’s natural, so here it is, shamelessly, a list I started when I was telling a friend I need wake-up calls. (Please let’s not argue about how someone else can also give me a wake-up call)

I want a guy (not just any guy hai feri) to give me wake-up calls
To pick me up
To find time to walk with me ALL OVER the city,
Go with me to parties
And dance till we drop
And eventually live with me,
Make me breakfast and eat, with love, the breakfast I made him.

*The above is just a very short list. I can come up with more.

Shristi says “solitude is the profoundest fact of human state, so it’s stupid to dream of dancing till I drop”. Thomas quotes a serial he watched “sometimes, perfection can be different than you imagined” re. The difference between a hopeless romantic and a not-hopeless-romantic. Fortunately/ unfortunately I’m in the first category. Arrrrgggh!

Saturday

Most of the time, we (my family) are so busy that weekends don’t feel like weekends anymore. Except perhaps for Loki who has to go to school the rest of the week. I sometimes even forget the day of the week, because everyday’s the same for me- work a little, waste some time, spend time online (kill me, Dear God) and sleep with a heavy heart (for having done so litle work) and a busy routine for the next day, which I end up not following anyways.

This Saturday is already an interesting one (at 10:30) though. Auntie Dearest (who my Mom loves as much as- definately no less than- me) doesn’t want to go where Mom had unilaterally planned for us to go. (I’m sorry but I have issues about my Mother’s love for her siblings which I make no effort to hide.) Loko is singing “Silsila Yeh Chahat ka” in a utterly cute girly way, and I have no clue where he heard that song early in the morning from. I’m finally blogging. My aim for today is to finish two units of translation, and do a portion of the work I’m doing for Baba so that after he comes back (he’s not in town at the moment), I don’t have to endure any “don’t disappoint me”s and do other work that I’ve committed to. Also so that I can meet Ajju after forever tomorrow. (For that matter, my working pace is majorly going down. I’ve become so damn guffadi, you can’t even begin to imagine.)

For brunch today (daal-bhaat at 10 like every other Saturday) we had 3 varieties of farsi (pumpkin). Loki joked that if he had to eat any more fasri, he’d ang himself on a farsi ko lahara (pumpkin stalk) and kill himself. I have my problems with these people (who doesn’t have problems with their families?) but I simply love them. Loads and loads and loads. I wonder how bland my life will be without them (or theirs without me.)

I’m going to read a bit before I start working.

Toodles,
Maichyang

GPK- Just Something I Found

“In 2003 when GP Koirala met the Maoists in a secret venue in India, they offered him the first presidency in exchange for the NC’s support for the Maoist demand for a constituent assembly and republic. Koirala refused.” (http://www.nepalitimes.com.np/issue/2008/05/23/GuestColumn/14806)

I pity the poor old man, but at the same time my respect for him continues to grow. In the end the Nepali Congress did end up supporting the two demands that the Maoists put forward, and even leading the movement for them. Koirala could have said yes to the Maoists’ proposal and gained himself the position, but he wuldn’t have been true to his politics (and the people would’ve noticed something fishy). We may argue about what Girija Prasad Koirala and the party he led fought for, but we can’t deny that this man was more for the country than for a post at the hardest of times.

I hate that GPK is handing a Minister Post to Sujata like it’s her inheritance, becasue she doesn’t have the political knowledge or experience for it, but this man has done the country much good, and I salute him for that.